Taking a-part

You look at the notice. You decide to give it a shot. It's a creative thing, so you go away and rummage in the barn of your head. Nothing useful comes out. You pound your head. No luck today. You play the waiting game. You try to shut the door of consciousness hoping this will drop a huge hint to the submerged iceberg in your head.

Things start to trickle in. There is no startling inspiration, so you go to work hard on it. This is going to be one of those workman-like efforts. Eventually you come up with something that just passes the entry barrier. It'll have to do.

You turn it in. Best I could do, you say. I'll put it in and forget about it. But naturally, you don't. Hope, that comfortably numb bastard, seeps in through the crevices. Soon the spark of "perhaps I might win something" sets fire to the room. "It does take some hard work to win", you say to your lazy and sentimental encephalon. You buy your own syllogism.

Ah, but you didn't count on this being the real world. You take part - you lose - again. "But I didn't really have a chance, did I?", you relapse. But you look at the results. You think "some of these are not so great. Fine, that one was, but surely this one isn't? Mine is better". You're not in love with the concept of subjective judging. Again.

Will you take part next time? What's the use? But maybe next time, they'll change? C'mon, give them a chance. It must have been one person who didn't like it. Can't please everyone all the time. Here, let's look at it again. Hmm, you can't tell whether it's good or bad. Yo've lost all feeling in the opinion-cortex. Again.