Monkey wrenchAs I write this, Harbhajan Singh, Andrew Symonds, and co. are probably arguing the allegedly racist comments. It's fair to say that most Indians don't think too much of being called a "monkey" but obviously it touches a raw nerve for other cultures. However, the argument that Indians worship a monkey-god and hence it can't be a racist-word is hilarious - tell that to people who get called a rat or a buffalo. Perhaps a better line of reasoning is a Darwinian one.
Assuming the Turbanator (who has a long history of run-ins with the likes of Ponting, right from the days of Sharjah) didn't use that m-word, what could he have said? A few guesses that appeal to another mon-word, that of "the mondegreen":
1. "Mai.n kyaa, yeh kyaa bol rahe ho jii?" - He's Punjaabbee, so "mai.n kyaa" is quite possible.
2. "Man kiyaa to kuch bhii bolegaa kyaa?"
3. Or the entirely possible "maa ki" ki roti or the unlikely invitation to partake of "makki di roti"
4. Perhaps Harbhajan was trying to sledge Symonds' Hindustani classical knowledge by finding out if he knew all about "mia.n ki todii".
5. Or, given the tough situation, he was singing that famous "Guddi" prayer song: "humko manki shakti denaa".
If you think the above was farcical, in my defence, was just trying to mirror some of the events of the 2nd Test.